As Shona Laing Starts Singing

“Dude, of course I know. It was the CIA who organised to have him killed, and then conveniently had some bystander killed as the suspect,” Aaron explained. The TV now on mute showing repeats of a short black-and-white recording.
    “That’s the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard, why would the CIA want him killed?” Marc shot back.
    “Well, like, so his policies were super weak in the eyes of the CIA, and they were worried that he’d get back into power. Because he was supposedly really supportive of an independent Cuba, and he also wanted to avoid war with the USSR, but the CIA wanted to nuke them so as to avoid any issue the USSR represented.”
    “Oh, that makes sense, except for the bit why the CIA had him killed! Like seriously, if you own the intelligence, you’re supposedly as big as the CIA are, and you supposedly have a knowledge of subtlety, why would you kill the President of the United States? It would be so much easier to just tarnish his record and have him dishonoured. I mean, we’re American, how the fuck can we claim patriotism if we’re willing to kill the President?”
    “Oh, and what’s your theory then, huh?” Aaron asked, his voice bordering on exasperation.
    “My theory?” Marc got off the couch and started pacing the floor in front of the TV as he designed his argument, “that the O’Ward guy was actually a Communist sleeper agent, as was the guy that shot him.” Seeing the smirk developing on Aaron’s face, Marc was quick to explain, “no but like, think about it. Russia and USA are enemy states at this point, right? And maybe they’re about to launch a military campaign in the offset of America’s chaos, so they have these sleeper agents assassinate the President, but it backfired on them. Instead of dissolving American morale, it actually helped unify the people. Plus I reckon the CIA got wind of what the Russian’s were doing, and were super fast to getting the Jameson guy in as the substitute President.”
    “Sleeper agents? Dude, that’s so stupid. The Russians didn’t even have Sleeper agents until, like, the eighties.” Aaron had no idea if that was true, but he was just hoping to poke holes in Marc’s argument.
    “Uh, yeah they did, dude. The Russians were, like, developing Sleeper agents for the Nazis or something I’m pretty sure. Hang on, we need a third-party opinion. Jason!” Marc called out down the hallway.
    A muffled “what do you want?” was yelled back.
    “Are you watching channel eight?”
    “Yeah!” the voice now getting louder as Jason approached the share room. He had his own TV so didn’t often venture down.
    “Me and Marc are having a debate, who do you think did it? The CIA or the Russians?” Aaron asked.
    “Uh neither, his death was the result of the lovers feud. Because he was in an affair with that other chick… you know, blonde hair, has the mole? She’s like an eight and always on those pin-up posters. Anyway, the Oxford guy is also getting in with her, like totally enraptured by her. So when Oxford finds out that he’s also seeing the chick, he goes and kills him.” Jason explained, as though it were the most obvious thing.
    “Yeah, the CIA is looking all the better now, to be honest,” Marc admitted.
    “Yeah, no, after hearing that response, Russian sleeper agents seems plausible.”